I just read this in the “Outhouse”, the forum not the building, and I’d like to put it here too…
All through his childhood, he wanted to be an astronaut, but nobody ever prepared him for this. Peter Pembroke shook his head in disbelief. Of course they hadn’t prepared him. It would have blown their big secret.
“What do you mean, there’s nothing out there?” he demanded, looking between the NASA representative and another astronomer.
“There’s nothing. It’s all been a ruse. We sent up a few probes at the beginning of the space program and–nada. Nothing’s up there.”
Peter shook his head again. “I don’t understand. How can there be nothing? There are stars, galaxies, an entire universe to explore!”
“Yeah. Yeah, we were banking on that, but…no go. Sorry, Pembroke, but that’s all it is. There’s nothing up there. The stars? Just anomalies. Galaxies? Blurry anomalies. The universe ends at Pluto.” The NASA representative shrugged helplessly. “I was just as disappointed at you, trust me. But what could we do? There was too much money invested in the program to start going around telling people that there’s nothing in outer space.”
“So what’s there? I mean, does it just end?”
“There’s a big wall, actually. We’ve done our best to penetrate it, but nothing’s gotten through so far.”
“A big wall,” Peter echoed, incredulous. This was absurd. A big wall?
“A big wall.” The scientist nodded his head. “We were just as baffled as you.”
“So what did you do?”
“We turned to theologians, priests, the like. We worked with archaeologists to scour the earth for some explanation.” The guy from NASA glanced at his counterpart before continuing, leaning forward on his elbows. “You won’t like it.”
“Try me.”
“We found another book of the Bible, kind of a last word from God.”
“And..?”
“It warned against the exploration of space, saying that the universe was incomplete. He was only interested in what happened on earth, so why put in all the effort of making an infinite realm with infinite worlds and stars?”
It took Peter a while to respond to that. He’d always attended church; his mother had been very determined to see to that. Nothing had ever hinted at God’s laziness before. “So you’re telling me…”
“Yeah. We are. It’s just us, God, and some angels.”
He had to laugh. He really did. This, from scientists? These two men were two of the top minds in the country, and this was their explanation? Peter rose from his seat. “I’m sorry. If this is some sort of joke, I don’t find it very funny.”
“It’s no joke, Pembroke. Please, sit down. We can show you the scrolls.”
Peter hesitated. “Why? I mean, why are you telling me this? You could’ve just sent me on my way, saying I didn’t qualify for the program.”
“Yeah, well. We’re considering alerting the public, given the circumstances, and we wanted to see how you’d react to gauge the public reaction.”
One of them pushed an ancient scrap of parchment toward him. Carefully, he took up the tweezers that the scientist had used to move it, pulling it closer. It resembled the pictures he had seen of the Dead Sea Scrolls, the parchment yellowed and burned in many places. He frowned. “This could be anything. Besides, I don’t read this language.”
“No, of course you don’t. Here.” The other man handed him a lamented text, and Peter took it as well, sitting back to read it.
And the Lord spoke, saying, “And on the day of the summer solstice, when your world stands on end, the universe will begin to contract…”
Peter frowned. “I don’t understand what this means. Contract?”
They exchanged glances. “The lost book details what might happen if the apocalypse never comes. It seems so many people were prepared for it that God never got around to it. Now we’re faced with this: God’s done with his little art project. Now he’s going to smash it.”
“Smash it!” Peter almost found himself on his feet. “What do you mean, smash it?”
“Well, while we’re all prepared for the end of the world, we’ve been so busy trying to stop it from coming that we forgot its purpose: to bring the glory of the kingdom of God to Earth and eradicate evil. And he’s tired of waiting.”
“Bored, you could say.”
“Bored. With us.” Peter’s voice fell flat.
“That’s right. And now, that wall we mentioned? It’s collapsing. That is, it’s getting closer everyday, on all sides. Pluto and Neptune are already gone.”
The rest of the conversation was a blur, but it narrowed down to this: Peter, and the rest of the world, had one year left before God finished clearing the clay off his pottery wheel. He thanked them for their time, signed the papers swearing himself to secrecy until NASA made the announcement, and slipped away to his home in Orlando.
A year.
How do you stop God from destroying the universe?
He stood over his bathroom sink, watching himself brush his teeth. “Bored, are you? All right then. Let’s make it a little less boring!”
Peter called a friend at a local television station and got himself a one minute slot on the evening news. He made his announcement, and NASA surprised him by backing him up. The world was in an uproar. Believers wavered between disbelief and fury. More scientifically inclined folks looked the situation more dead in the eye–if we only have a year to live, then let’s live it!
The first month brought total chaos and destruction. Every small time criminal in the world thought it would be the perfect time to loot and riot and smoke and snort and shoot. Police forces everywhere worked triple time getting the mob under control. The second month brought harder times when people stopped showing up to work. Food wasn’t being processed and transported or sold. People were beginning to starve. Water supplies were running low. Most electrical suppliers shut down, leaving the world in darkness. Hospitals were closed. Diseases ran rampant.
Strangely, no wars had broken out. Too busy managing their own nations, armies were focused inward, with their only outward calls going for more help. Nations learned to work together, and gradually, the fires stopped burning. With the promise of safety, the good people of earth returned to work. Crops were harvested, food began to move again. Power came back on. Slowly, gradually, the world righted itself. The panic had subsided, and with that triumph came an odd sort of peace.
Peter watched it all from his front porch, leaning against the railing. It seemed that the apocalypse had come and gone, and people proved themselves to be the devils and the angels. The plagues had been fewer than the bible called for. There had never been any fiery rain from the heavens. And in the end, people had sorted it out on their own.
For the first time in human history, there was peace.
Growing up, Peter had always thought that roaming the heavens was what he wanted to do. He had prepared himself everyday, studying, learning to fly, pressing his body with new challenges. He had readied himself for every possible emergency in space, hoping that his hard work would someday benefit mankind.
But nobody had ever prepared him for this.[/i]